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stale birthday cake


stale birthday cake


another year, another candle

my blistered feet,

still chained to the treadmill

i’m a modern day Sisyphus,

a cynic with dreams

a mere one out of thousands

but left alone, when you take away the screen


isn’t it funny?

they tell us we’re supposed to be the hopeful ones

still oblivious, still childlike, still green

and yet here I am, scrubbing my hands

rinsing, washing,

sudsing them clean

gone are the days, when i was able to indulge

in blithe, youthful stupidity


we are twin moths, darting forward

entranced by the light, we chase after the unknown

is it courage? is it necessity? i do not know.

is the brightness ahead from the sun?

or the mere glow of a smartphone?

i’m put on the diet

of sarcasm, of playing it cool

i force-feed myself nonchalance

daily dosage taken by the spoonful

for the sake of my pride

i stumble, and hide

my raw, grotesque heart, in my sleeve

swallow the shards of broken glass,

surprised when it tears up my insides


i consume the frustration, it consumes me instead

“that’s unexpected,” i say

as if i’d expected to be anything but

bereft

a floundering mess, a prototype

a work in progress

first times are awful,

no point of reference, no safe-fall

yet solidarity, is what keeps us sane

we’re in this together,

witness the carnage from afar

we watch the grey plumes

the familiarity of inexperience, naivety,

high-schooler blues

close the door on this chapter

bury the ashes of our youth


you exhale,

pleased when the fog finally clears,

“see now, that wasn’t too bad”

“it’s over, we’re fine now” you wipe off your sweat

but i’m standing here, trembling

still seeing red


growing pains, coming of age

quite frankly, a painfully predictable cliche

we’re told

we ought to be pleased, to celebrate

i put on my sparkly hat

wear the sash, dust my hands

and cut into another stale birthday cake.

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